We’re not Existing, We’re Living

Welcome to my blog.

My inspiration for this blog stems from my own journey!

For the last few years I’ve slowly started to learn how to love myself and start living, yet I’m still learning and I would like to share my journey with you and try to reach out to others what works for me or what you feel resonates​ with you.

I’m currently a student studying teaching and CBT, to eventually become a mentor so I will be basing some of my knowledge on books and research, as well as my own understanding.

This blog I hope will be enjoyable and readable,  hopefully my blog can help you to find yourself and finally begin to love yourself and find peace and balance​ in your everyday lives.


Having your own Individuality


“Ethnic, Gothic, or Hippy? It makes no difference to me, for I will always be different not caring if someone accepts my individuality, for I am 1 and never expected to give anymore of me, My individuality is on sight for all to see, and that’s all of me”





Do you often look at people of a different nature and suddenly hate them? Do you seem to not quite understand them? Or do you view these people as mysterious, people that make you want to know more about ?

You see I’ve realised these people are happy, go lucky people with their own sense of self and have their own view on the world and from this view I saw warmth, inner peace, and tranquillity. for 2 weeks I started doing things they would do and I must say I’m absolutely amazed! I was sick of the usual on my lunch break I was also sick of doing the same thing day in day out. Part of this journey is to explore and find out things of other people. popular cultures and ethnicities in order to make positive changes in my life, instead of the usual café of coffee shop, I went to lovely restaurants which consisted of a wholesome menu of beautiful food with an ethnic touch, The food ranged from pouched eggs, to avocado and lime ciabatta, home smoked salmon and vegan brunches, and lets not begin with the drinks, sherbet lemonade and watermelon iced teas ….. The food absolutely to die for!! the restaurant was full of art of which was of peoples drawings the element was wood with upcycled furniture with all different cushions on the chairs, it was very inviting I must say, and also welcoming as I also met lovely people in the café one lady had complimented on my hair as I had a few electric blue hair extensions in the ends of my hair she said it looked very cosmic! I had greeted her with a smile and said thank you it was quite uplifting as I was a little worried I had looked a little stupid and wasn’t able to carry it off.

She on the other hand was very tribal she wore fair trade clothes a lovely crystal necklace and had different colour dreadlocks in her hair, I thought it looked fab, as we got talking she told me she was a Reiki teacher for a living and came with such positive energy around her I was truly amazed, she went onto tell me the benefits of Reiki as I found this interesting and it definitely  caught my attention. My Reiki session will be booked soon and I will let you know the outcome on my future blog.

After I had a lovely bit of lunch on my lunch break I then went to a charity shop and started looking for pleated skirts long printed skirts cropped trousers and anything gothic or of that nature! I found denim jackets and denim knee length skirts along with printed novelty tees And to my amazement I did also find a gothic bag that has speakers for eyes that u can just plug your mobile phone in from a aux connection. I absolutely fell in love with my items that I was ready to embrace the changes into my life and express my individuality to the world, I loved the fact that people wasn’t judgemental of me and I felt comfortable learning new ideas to adapt to a new personality. This was about learning from others, opening up to people in their world and taking elements of it home with me to explore.

I still have lots to do and I’m excited to learn more and just really get out there and start living, finding new interesting people in my life 🙂 and so far so good as I have a day booked to meet my new friend in the same café to talk about Reiki and book a session, I’m also learning meeting new interesting people can be easily done if your ready to venture out get out there.

My next blog will be on this topic as I will be looking at the benefits and welcoming it into my life.

Finding Your Inner Self

inner self

What is the meaning of finding your Inner self? What if I was to tell you it could change your life and you could experience a wonderful part of who you are, parts you never knew existed or just discovering a brand new you.

For me it started a few month, I started really looking at how I wanted to change certain aspects about me but I wasn’t to sure how to go about it, For a long time I felt trapped and ashamed to really express who I was and how I wanted to come across to the world. It started by me really sitting down and looking at different things I could change in my life and adapt to new ways of thinking,  new ways of changing my personality, and my whole outside appearance I was sick of following suit so to speak and decided it wasn’t for me anymore.

So I started with a complete new hair style that I wouldn’t of dreamed of getting but it was part of shifting away from old patterns and expressing the new me I was always a great believer that it just takes you to step outside of your comfort zone and you was already on your way. I then started looking at my wardrobe and throwing old clothes away I would look in charity shops and high street shops of little things like books, bags and jewellery completely not the sort that I was into but I could still adapt to it because there part of me that liked the items and so i was willing to go for it and to give it a go. I then started eating better even if it was just 3 times per week and swapping my snacks for fruit and sugary drinks for water although it was hard I weren’t dying by trying lol

But within a few weeks of this lifestyle change and change in habits slowly and surely this shift started rubbing off on other people, I started to see I was drawing their attention and I was suddenly more attractive and I didn’t completely know why……So I researched and looked into this and I started to find reasons and they were as follows:

  • Spiritually people start assuming your a better person! You see you’ve gone from the same old same old day in day out persona and gone about your daily life in the same old usual ways to really working on yourself from the inside your likes dislikes have changed so for instance the hair cut I mentioned to others they love it to me I’m a little unsure, but by others liking my new hairstyle it made me more confident and it was confidence that in turn made people draw closer to me it also made me feel that it was I actually made the right decision by having this choice of this hairstyle might actually suit me better and I may come across by looking better and feeling better in myself that I’m no longer stressed as much as I was before slowly I have actually changed and my outward appearance has, so basically your now coming across an all rounded better person to your peers,
  • Somehow you’ve communicated to the universe that you want to change all aspects about you and in turn the universe has communicated back! So all around you the the change was good and for the better, There is so much extensive evidence on this by working with the universe and the law of attraction.
  • Just a few  little improvements has caught peoples attention and now they want to know your secret, what goes on for you behind closed doors, how interesting you’ve become, your now mysterious and trust me…… this is a good thing.

You see changing your inner self isn’t as hard as people think! and You are what you ‘think’ its a scientific fact if you keep telling yourself ‘It would never work’ or ‘I’m not good enough’, I cant do it’  your already setting yourself up for failure and nothing will ever change. It starts of slow, nothing major you start to see what’s working for you and what’s not as you start changing certain things that goes on in your life your able to keep making changes as your already doing it you’ve made that step, you have to understand a lot someone feeling like they don’t want to try or by not taking those little steps would really stem from fear and I cannot stress enough that just that one change will give you that confidence to keep you going.

keeping an eye on your self awareness your thoughts, words and actions and thinking about how you can change them if negative or how you could use them in positive ways in your life. Read positive books, stay away from any form of negativity if you can help it, try not to let things stress you like they once did 6 months ago. Try to use the best attributes of your personality that you admire or that you admire in someone and feel yourself becoming more like this. Be fully aware of YOU and try to become a better version of YOU. Someone couldn’t of said that any better because the bottom line is, it is only YOU that YOU can love and take care of for the rest of your life.

I have had to really get myself involved in reading up on this, and I’m loving the path that I’m on I see the changes I feel the attraction, I’m  creating a better personality an interesting personality, I’m on this journey as well as you if you want to be, I’m really looking at getting back to nature learning along the way and sharing these positive experiences with you and any comments you feel to leave on my blog around any of my story’s and experiences is more then welcome because we are here to learn from each other

But I will admit this is the best time of my life right about now because I’m learning new things about me that lay doormat or that I had suppressed or that I simply didn’t know existed and I can honestly say this is just the beginning!





Upcyling Your Old Clothes

So with the weather coming out to play just in time for Easter, being short of cash I’m in need of some new clothes! But at the moment I just can’t afford it. So I went through my draws and found old pairs of jeans or well worn ones and tops and decided to totally restyle them into ripped shorts 😉

So I measured on my leg with a pen how much lenght I wanted to take off (bearing in mind I’m leaving 2 more inches for turnovers) and then I cut right the way across .

I then started making small little cuts on the actual jeans with scissors, just small lines will do 

I did the same on the pockets at the back.

So from this point my cuts are where I want them etc …..

We then put them on a normal wash in the washing machine and wait for them to finish

 ..    …   ……

I now wait …..




Gok Wan eat your heart out ……,I must say I’m impressed 🙂 My pockets on the back came out good too 🙂

It wasn’t time consuming and definetly worth the effort. You can find many ideas on You Tube and the videos are pretty straightfoward and easy to copy and follow. 

I also Managed to make an off the shoulder top too 🙂 so before you throw your old clothes, see if there’s anything you can do to recycle them.

Early Spring Fire Pit

So today was a lovely day as most of you would also agree, Early spring and we had decent weather to say the least!!

So while the sun was out I decided to get a BBQ going 

Not just any BBQ …..  Oh no…., this one was different. 

So my neighbour had some things knocking about his back garden and I noticed a washing machine drum, yes thats right- a washing machine drum 

So me and the kids as well as their mates decided to fill it with the wood fire and coal

I ignited it and away it went.

We got some chicken out and marinated it in different sauces etc and got it cooking 

I’m happy with the results! 

You can pick these up in your local area on Gumtree or oder them off of eBay they are pretty cheap and a cheaper option for a BBQ without lavishing lots of money on one.

The chicken came out lovely btw was a really good idea, I’m really pleased that it actually worked

Kids Crafts Clearouts

Well today I received my first lot of crafts bundles that I bidded for on eBay, luckily I won!! Hehe I love being a winner I mean don’t we all aha
But in all fairness we just keep bidding and looking and try, try again 

I just put in the search engine: 

  • Kids crafts clear outs
  • Kids craft bundles
  • And crafts joblot

You will be surprised what you will find!

Also try Gumtree in your local area, as current childminders are getting rid of crafts they no longer need & ask at your local nursery or school if they are having any clear outs.
This helps with children’s school activities at home and keeps them from being bored.

Parents On A Budget!!

Children’s learner books 
Write an wipe clean 

EBay: Learner book bundles, rrp £3.99 each got them for £4.99 per bundle £3 postal charge 

Mathematics ones also!

These can be used for children aged 4-7 yrs and for children with special needs,

I encourage these for children struggling with homework at home, As long as its kept academic these should be of help as there easy to follow, colourful and children can use their imagination as the English books are full of characters and animals.

Lazy Sundays

So today I decided to totally revamp my bathroom, I started off by throwing away stuff I didnt need and replaced it by stuff I had knocking about 

Excited.. .. ..

VERY!! Hehe

So by getting rid of the stuff I don’t need and putting in my everyday essentials.
I must say, I can’t stress enough that us Single Mums need our downtime and we certainly are in need to take care or ourselves!

I’ve put a few suggestions in place for your very own bath Spa, You can start by using what u have and can always add to it little by little 

  • Bath Milk (Baylis & Harding)
  • Bath bombs or bath Fizzers
  • Bubble bath by Radox
  • Shower jelly (Lush shop)
  • Bubble soap bar
  • Bath spa machine (eBay)
  • Candles (preferably large ones)               

Baths never felt sooooo good!!